In 1952, when Ron Durston is called up into the army for National Service, all he wants is to be posted somewhere sunny like Tahiti or Weymouth where he can fraternise with the native girls and bring home a medal or two to impress his mates. Instead he finds himself standing guard at an army camp in Ass-End, Yorkshire, which doesn't appear on any maps, where the winter is cold, the native girl is invisible... [click here for more]
After Dirk Beretta, ex- poster boy for the Space Marines, saves the Winterbotham Nachos heiress from a fate worse than death in the Space Weasel kibble factories, a romantic cruise around the galaxy with her looks like a well-earned rest.
But Royalist revolutionaries on the Planet Of The Squid have other ideas. When they hatch a plan to replace the democratic government with a moronic monarch, Dirk... [click here for more]
A hundred light-year quarantine zone protects the primitive jungle tribes of the Platypus Planet from unauthorized interference. But not from BastadoCorp acquiring mining rights through bribery and fraud.
When Dirk Beretta's girlfriend tells him to get off the couch and look for a job, he finds the perfect opportunity, thousands of light years from her, with free guns and beer, as security chief... [click here for more]
How do you repair a dead planet?
Maintenance Bot M-3 was always proud of the smooth and reliable operation of the starships it maintained, as they roamed the galaxy searching for life on unexplored worlds. It lived for the desperate struggle against the forces of chaos and decay, fighting against time to complete repairs before disaster struck.
But this job may be beyond even its capabilities.... [click here for more]
Ever wondered where the aliens are? Bill is sure they don't exist, but after centuries searching the galaxy for any sign of intelligent life, I'm not about to give up yet.
I've just received this hot tip from a gang of Luddites out near M15. Hot enough that even Bill has chosen to join me to for my final attempt to prove him wrong...
A 4,000 word (approx 20 pages) science fiction short story. ... [click here for more]
A stripper, a hitman, his target, and a monk with a severed head in his bag. It's a typical passenger manifest for the crew of the space freighter Big Momma.
Russ is hiding from 'Nam flashbacks. Alex may have met her dream guy. Max is tempted to throw them all out the airlock.
They only have to survive a three week flight from the Heavenly Retreat habitat--The Sleaziest Place In The... [click here for more]
Tired of healing wounded soldiers on the borders of the British Empire, Silas Cane returns to the heartlands of Victorian England as a rural doctor. The quiet Oxfordshire village is a welcome break from the chaos of war, until a smiling madman dies of a disease never seen before.
After watching so many men die, Cane will do whatever it takes to keep the villagers alive.
If they don't kill him first.... [click here for more]
Vicious, congenitally bureaucratic, and proud of their resplendent flame-red uniforms which give them a five minute life expectancy in combat, the Flaming Space Weasels wiped out most of Dirk Beretta's fellow space marines at the battle of Din Bin Foo... then served them for lunch with a nice Merlot.
In the aftermath, Dirk quits his job as poster boy for the Space Marines, to drown his sorrow in... [click here for more]
You remember last summer, I told you about Frank's time machine?
Uncle Jim had a talent for tall tales over a pint of real ale, but this one was a whopper. Not content with finding his way a hundred years into the future, he just had to set out on the fishing trip of a lifetime.
In a space suit. On Europa.
A 4,000 word science fiction short story. PDF, mobi (Kindle) and epub formats.... [click here for more]
Frank has finally finished the time machine in his garage. But the expedition to the future with Uncle Jim, Fatso the cat, and a keg of real ale goes centuries off course. Can they solve one of the greatest mysteries in the history of beer before they find their way home, or will they become sizzling entertainment for a world with no TV or Internet?
A 7,500 word science fiction short story. ... [click here for more]
No-one expects to find alien life in NGC 2419. But when the first probes encounter a dirty, industrial planet somewhere no human has gone, the race is on to be the first to welcome its inhabitants into the galactic community. Will it be two poker-playing starships, or The Future, for whom pretension is a vocation, not just a way of life?
A 5,500 word (approx 22 pages) science fiction first... [click here for more]